this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Randomize
