Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Randomize