woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
