I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Randomize
