My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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