hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize