Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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