i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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