cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
