At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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