Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Randomize
