so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
someone owes me an orgasm
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize
