Pappa wants mamma naked
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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