I am full of burrito and curiosity
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
