I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize