Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
