You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Randomize
