I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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