Non-Jews are for practice
time to smoke my breakfast
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Randomize
