I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
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