she was so not down for the gang bang
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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