As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
