Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Randomize
