We got so high we made milksteak
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Randomize
