Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
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