I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Randomize
