This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
