Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
youre lurking in front of me
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
