Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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