everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
