no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
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