my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize