ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
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