dude i'm inner monologue high
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize