thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
