I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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