ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
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