I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
