The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
