I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Randomize
