It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
