i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
