Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
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