woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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