Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize
