hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
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