kristin has been a bad kristin
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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