The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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