I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
Randomize
