I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Randomize
